A: What did Simon mean earlier when he said that thing about my mum and her fingers?
B: Oh that, that was a joke
A: Was it?
A: Oh
B: Y
A: Right
B: Or your mum is so poor she…
A: Shops at Sainsbury’s
B: No
A: Tesco
B: No
A: Asda
B: No
A: No But that’s where poor people shop
B: Yes I know it is
A: You told me you can get a can of beans for eight pence in Asda. I wonder if they know about that in Africa
B: You’re missing the point
A: Of course Africans can grow their own beans
B: No the point is not to be so literal. You can’t say your mum is so poor she shops in Asda, because that’s a fact
A: No it isn’t. My mum shops in Waitrose. Although if she’s got the car she goes to….
B: I don’t care where she shops. Look you are supposed to say something that clearly isn’t true.
A: Like
B: Like: your mum is so poor when she kicks cans down the street that’s her moving house and don’t say it isn’t true because I know it isn’t true, but that’s what makes it funny
A: Oh please just do it one more time and I swear I’ll get it
B: Ok Your mum is so poor she buys holes with socks in them
A: Well your mum smells of fish, wets herself and has a fanny like a bucket…was that funny?
B: For different reasons, yes it was
A: Ah, you know what they say, nothing’s so funny as the truth
B: (sigh)
A: What?! Well at least she doesn’t lick other peoples fingers..their faces yes but not their fingers.
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